This is the Plain Jane master list of movie reviews. No images, no fancy shit. Just text and links and the yawning hum of the Earth’s rotation. It’s a simple movie guide. I’m like Leonard Maltin here, minus the steamy sex appeal.
Notes on alphabetization:
We here at The Constant Bleeder are from the USA. We’re not only from the USA, but we’re from Texas. We’re not only from Texas, but we got hit on the head with a beer pump really hard back in 2002 and have been a little mixed-up ever since.
For non-English language films, we went with the title most widely used in the US. For example, almost no likable person in America refers to Jean-Luc Godard’s first film as A Bout de Souffle; no, we say Breathless. On the opposite note, no one in America ever translates the name of Michelangelo Antonioni’s 1960 film into English as The Adventure; NOPE, everyone here, from the loftiest film critic to the dumbest person at Wal-Mart, knows it by its Italian title, L’Avventura. So, that’s our rule here, too.
On another foreign-language matter, we don’t alphabetize the articles, grammatically speaking. El Topo is in the “T” section. Les Vampires is under “V”. Un Chien Andalou slices up eyeballs in the “C” bin. You get it. You’re smart.
For titles that begin with numbers, we alphabetize them as if those numbers were spelled out. Thus, 42nd Street is found under “F” and 2001: A Space Odyssey is under “T”. You get that, too. I’m starting to like you.
Finally, I am 100% SURE that I’ve made many alphabetization mistakes here. If you notice any that really bother you and it’s keeping you up nights, let me know. Maybe I’ll fix it.